This is my very first blog post - on 'Cyndie Uncorked'. You may deduce from the name of the site, that it should be full of content about which I have been waiting to write for a long time. That will, indeed, happen. Sometime down the road.
For today, my first attempt at blogging will be much more reflective, with a bit of sadness.
On Sunday, the love of my life, Rob, died very suddenly. To my knowledge, there was nothing 'wrong' with him physically that may have alerted us to anything problematic. He just said he was feeling a bit weak and tired. 2 minutes later he was consumed by what appeared to me to be a seizure. Apparently, this is what a heart attack looks like. I don't believe he suffered any pain.
It has been almost five days and I'm finding it really confusing to follow my emotions. They range from deep sorrow, to anger, to loving memories of our time together, back to anger and all points in between. Following my emotions is totally exhausting.
My message to any of you who are reading this, is "Don't wait". Don't put off that trip, or redecorating, or updating your eventual wishes, or recognizing the importance of the connection you have to your partner, and connections with your family and friends. Do it all now, before it's too late.
Maybe it's helpful for those of us Rob left behind that it is summer time and our kids are still around to help us through this. My own daughters will be back at university soon, and they will need to be fully present for and committed to that. I'm hopeful that before then, I will find my own lifeline, so that they will feel okay about not being here for me all the time. They need to get on with school and their lives.
I do know that I have a ton of support from my Personal Learning Network - all of you, and for that I am overwhelmed and eternally grateful.
As a last word, for those who say "I'll do it later", please don't wait until then. DO IT NOW!